Ponderings and Musings...My Story as an Artist and Teacher



I'm an artist. I'm a mixed media instructor. I teach people. It's what I do best. Come the end of 2007, I do not know what I will be doing. I'm scared. I'm nervous. I am not a developer of product. I am not a seller of product. I am not one who is interested in "ways to make a fast buck". I'm a teacher. I teach. It's what I do. It's what I've been doing for almost 10 years now.

Tristan was born in 1997. For several months I worked at a bookstore near my home. A few months before Tristan was born, while walking into work, I walked and fell in liquid garbage that was left on the floor (that I obviously did NOT see). That accident changed my life in many ways. I had to stop working (I won't go into the back pain I experienced, my son being born with kidney problems -was it because of the fall?- and the experience of falling while carrying a baby plus, I was emotionally traumatized with everything that had happened I never wanted to set food in that place again-it was horrible). I won't go into the financial aspect of it, but I don't want to ever ever have to be in that place again.

Almost a year after Tristan was born, I had been making and selling greeting cards (and doing well at it-not great, but well). David was working again (he was also out of work at the time I had fallen, having lost his job because of massive lay offs of a big name company). I walked into Stamp Stamp Stamp in Century City and it was suggested that I show Nancy Shillito my cards. Nancy worked at the store and was also a teacher for Judikins. She's a very good soul. She was extremely kind at my (novice) cards and told me that I should try my hand at teaching. I taught a few classes at the various Stamp Stamp Stamp stores in the beginning. I also started to branch out to other locations but the classes didn't fill well. Plus, they didn't "fill me" well.

I learned how to make books. I began exploring paint and canvas and collage (again). In the process, I taught myself. My classes changed. It was *very very VERY* hard in the beginning trying to get stores (and students!!) into things other then shaker cards, shrink plastic and the like. Violet from Violets Rubber Stamp Inn, Rita from West Hills Rubber Stamp Shoppe, Laurie & Rich from A Little Bizaar, and a handful of other generous store owners let me try. We've come a long way, baby.

After branching out from basic cards to a whole 'nother universe, I started teaching across the country. That was even more difficult (trying to "sell" my classes in the East Coast where no one was doing stuff like this at the stamp stores). Nee of CT & Nee, Jaime of Crafters Workshop and a few other stamp store owners let me try. I held many a first "East Coas" class at someone's home in those days, too.

I started using acrylic paint in my class. I started using better supplies. Supplies cost money. I had to raise my prices. I had to fight to raise my prices. I still do not believe in making students go out and buy hundreds of dollars of supplies for a class. I would rather bring them for you, so you can experiment. It was a fight and sadly, it still is with some. People do not realize that it is not unusual for me to spend over $25,000 a year on supplies for my classes (not for me!!) for my students' use. I still only make less than minimum wage.

Slowly my student base grew. I began to develop a "core group" of students-people that were eager to learn, experiment, play and push themselves. I still teach many of those students today...and I consider them friends and amazing artists in their own right.

I've taught across the U.S. I've taught in Canada. I've taught off the coast of Mexico. I've taught in people's homes. I've taught in rubber stamp stores. I've taught at all of the big name conventions. I've taught in MA, NY, RI, CT, MD, FL, CO, NE, NV, AZ, OR, and CA. I mainly teach in rubber stamp stores.

I've been supporting my family (husband, child, me) as the sole supporter for the last 6 years now. Granted, we drive a 15 year old car (that needs a new engine). We live in the same rent controlled apartment that we moved into 11 years ago. We go without a lot of things. Most people take vacations. We don't. If I take a vacation, it's a working vacation meaning, I teach. I'm not telling you this for sympathy or anything else like that. I'm telling you it because it is the truth. I am not "rich" money wise (but rich in so many other ways)...I support my family but we live on a minimum wage salary. We live paycheck to paycheck like so many families do. I consider myself extremely lucky to be doing what I do and am thankful for it every day.

Folks, our stamp stores are in trouble. Seriously. Come the end of this year, the Mecca of Stamping might not exist anymore-Southern California (seriously, remember those days? We were considered extremely lucky to live where there were stamps growing off of the trees ;) ).

I have been exploring other options (just in case) but am finding myself in another fight. Institutions, colleges, and the like are biased against someone who has taught "at a rubber stamp store". Like it is a disease or a bad thing. They tell me it is is not real art. They don't look at my experience (I book classes every single weekend that I can. I have done that for 8 years now. I honestly think that I have taught well over 30,000 students in that time period-I am NOT tooting my own horn, my records show it.) How can teaching someone art be a "bad thing"? I do not understand that mentality.

I'm not sure how the year will end. I know that nothing lasts forever. But there is one thing I know for sure (Thanks Erma) that I am a teacher. I am an artist. I am an art teacher. That is what I am and what I always will be.

Comments

beth said…
oh my gosh....see, with that post, I want even more for you to be able to teach at Valley Ridge in Wisconsin.
I will try what I can in order to get you there....I just HAVE to take one of your classes !!!!

That was a great post....it really made me think.
I've never lived paycheck to paycheck and I've always driven a new car....but I'm still waiting to see what I'll be "when I grow up" and at least you DO know who you are !!!!!
suzi finer said…
From one who has experienced the roller coaster ride of life; things change. Fortunately, you are a gifted instructor, and there will always be some venue for you to create. Stamp, scrap, whatever, the titles given to shops are just names; people know where to go despite cliches. Those who snub art due to genre=tification are just wrong. There are no mistakes in art, and no labels for real artists.
Keep on working....
Love.
T2 said…
KK,
I know of no one in this biz who works harder than you. No one.

You have no idea how much I admire your tenacity and creativity. Although your crystal ball may be a bit foggy right now, your artistic light will no doubt cut through the gloom.

Big hugs, lady.
Kelly Kilmer said…
Thanks Beth. Thanks Suzi. Thanks Terry :)-Thanks everybody. I really appreciate it-even just having someone listen helps.
I'm not after a pity party or a put me on a pedestal party or whatever. I'm just trying to figure out what the hell I can do and some other ways to keep classes going. I wish I could figure out how to keep the stores alive but have been trying for years to do that...
I love teaching and want to continue to do so!!!
Anonymous said…
Kelly, I don't know what the answer is for teachers, store owners, and students/shoppers. I know that I, for one, am *dying* to have a creative "home"...a store where I can shop, take classes, etc. When I first moved here (St. Marys, GA), we had an amazing stamp store just down the road- Olde Towne Crafts. But they closed, and now my closest stamp store is over an hour away and it's just so hard to justify the gas to get out there often. I end up having to shop online when I need just an inkpad or a certain glue, which I know only contributes to the demise of the mom and pop stamp shops. :(

What I loved about taking your classes- besides the techniques, the new ideas, and playing with new "toys"!- is feeding off of the creative energy of people who love what I love..art journals. It is so hard to find other people IRL who share this love. I have tried working on an art journal at a scrapbooking crop, and I got strange looks and questions like "but WHY bother?" and "why not just scrap?"...being among those other ladies at your class was just amazing to me. My people. You know? That, along with everything I learned in the 3 classes I took from you that day, was worth every penny I spent on the classes! I don't know where I'll get such an experience if all the stamp stores close shop.

I wish I had some answers for ya...but if you ever teach at A Small Cleverness in Orange Park, Florida...I'm *there*, babe!

(BTW, the classes I took from you were at the Stamp Studio in Manchester, CT, back in 2005. I don't think the store is there anymore, b/c the website is gone now. Do you know? We moved from CT to GA in Oct. of 2005.)
Anonymous said…
Kelly, I've been taking your classes now for about 4 years. I've come a long way baby (LOL) and I never could've done it without you and the stores that supported your dream.
I will continue to take your classes as long as they're available and I'll continue to support our local stamp stores as long as they're around.
Linda
Anonymous said…
Hi Kelly, I started to commet and it got too long - so I blogged it because I think this is an amazing post and I think you're about to step off into the great amazing unknown - and that's awesome! You can read my whole comment on my blog
Kelly Kilmer said…
Thanks everyone. :)

Arika-The Stamp Studio closed :( So sad it was one of my favorites. I miss it. Closest I'm teaching now is MA though I am looking at other options...also have taught in Maryland (LOVE the Rubber Chicken store)...I have taught at A SMall Cleverness many many years ago.

Thanks Linda :) I appreciate it immensely and just love love love teaching and my students!!!!

Claudia-your blog post was great but what worries me is that my husband has had an extremely hard time finding work. He's been told time and time again that if "They" hire him, he will leave for a better paying job so "They" don't hire him (this is even crappy low paying jobs!) Other then teaching, I've only had "customer service jobs" like bookseller (also was the bookkeeper HA not sure why they had me do that other then I worked a summer at a bank when I was a kid..), babysitter-things like that (I Loved babysitting but hated the bookstore-management was evil!!) I'm scared that someone would look at my resume and say "she hasn't been working for "X" amount of years. I've been told time and time again that what I do is NOT real work. HA! I work more than 40 hours a week in addition to teaching classes.

I'm not a 'product developer'. The only thing I'd be interested in if I had to sell something would be my artwork though I do have a small idea for a small art supply business online like I did several years ago...yet it's not enough to pay the bills.

What I WANT to do is to continue teaching. What I was hoping that this post would do is to open people's eyes up to what is going on with our "art community" across the U.S. (and in So CA)...and maybe give me ideas as to if anyone is interested in taking classes outside of a rubber stamp store and if so, where? If anyone can recommend places in So CA that would be interested (other then Michaels-I'm not a big fan of corporate chains). I'm looking for mom and pop stores, and any kind of place that would hold an artsy class :)

I'm not awake enough yet so i hope this all makes sense...It's scary when people are relying on you to pay the rent, blah blah blah. It's been an exhilirating several years but there have been lots of roller coaster rides along the way...I know there are more to come but I just want to throw it all out to the world now...Being an ART teacher is what I want to continue to doooooooooooooooo...
Anonymous said…
Kelly
I remember back in the day when it was just you and me in a class at the Redondo Beach store.
God that was a loooong time ago!
You were the very first person I encountered that exposed me to real art (in my mind)
I am impressed with your passion and even more impressed that you are LIVING what is in your heart.

I have no kids, a little extra income and 103 excuses as to why I can't make art.
I read your blog and get inspired
(and riled up with all the good political news stuff :)

Please don't worry about the future - it will unfold and you'll be there with it - doing what you love.
Anonymous said…
Thank you Kelly for sharing your story, you have come a long way and there will always be obstacles in life, though seeing what you've been through I think you'll do fine. I believe that a good artist/teacher will always find a way to do what she loves. I believe in you!
Anonymous said…
I wish I could give some good advice but all I can send is a 'HUG'.. good luck and dont stop doing what you love!

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