Finding your voice
You know what I get tired of in this little community?
Games.
Pedestals.
Pissing contests.
Judgment.
Come on.
Seriously.
Get off your fucking pedestal. Don't put your art on a fucking pedestal. Don't put artists on pedestals. Stop being so damn judgmental. It's a fucking journal page. Seriously.
This isn't to anyone in particular, btw. It's to *anyone* and *everyone* who has ever had any doubt-self imposed or thrust upon them by others. I was going to say something yesterday but needed time to soak it all in.
What do you use a journal for?
It's YOUR safe place. It can be a place to:
document
record
vent
rave
gush
play
experiment
get it out and onto the page
create
dream
-seriously all those cute little word stamps (dream, believe, create) totally apply to art journals.
Your art journal is for *you*. Who really and honestly gives a shit if someone else doesn't think it's "good enough". HELLO? IT'S A JOURNAL. It's not hanging in the fucking Louvre.
It's
a
JOURNAL.
It ain't the Mona Fucking Lisa.
I highly doubt that Da Vinci sat down and worried if what he was putting in his books was "good enough". Seriously.
I had someone email me and tell me that a page the other day "just wasn't me" (uh, it was a simple page and it said what *I* wanted it to say). Uh, okay. I've had someone email me in the past saying that my shit looked like everyone else's shit (fuck you, I don't think so). Uh, okay. I've had people say absolute stupid STUPID shit to me that they would never want said to them nor would they say it to anyone else. I just stand there with my mouth open thinking "Really? REALLY? Did that person REALLY just say that?" Yup. Yes, they did.
I'm not tooting my own horn (or anyone else's horn here). I'm not just talking about MY experiences here 'cause I KNOW others have had 'em too. I'm just saying that a journal is your place to sit and expressive yourself-in whatever means you want, however you want, whenever you want (though I am a firm believer in daily journaling). It is *not* meant to be judged.
It has nothing NOTHING to do with how GOOD ANYONE is.
If I want to cut out an image, slap it down and write a few words around it and call it a page. If it says what I want it to say, it's a page. I don't need someone to email me and tell me that "it's someone else's image", it's not "original", it's not "you". If it friggin' says what I want it to say and I'm DONE WITH IT, I'm moving on. I want YOU to do the same thing as a journal keeper. As a journal artist.
Open up the page. Paint. Collage. Write. Do whatever makes you happy. Push the envelope. Try. Fail. Try again. Push push push. Play play play. Use your book to express YOU. Move on when you need to move on.
Stop looking at the shit in the magazines and comparing your work to it. It's NOT you. YOU are you. Seriously. You want your work to look like YOU made it. Not like someone else made it.
Someone tells you you're not "good enough". Screw 'em. Do a page about it and move on. You've got a journal to fill. You've got pages to play with. You have things to record. You have moments and thoughts and ideas to spill out.
Worried about what's gonna happen when you croak? Why? We all go through shit-good times and bad times. It's that sappy saying called a roller coaster of life. It's true though-up, down, we all ride it. People say "Oh, I don't want my kids to read this when I die." WHY? So they'll find out that Mom (or Dad) was a real, honest, unique person?? That Mom or Dad fucked up every now and then. That good things and bad things happen-TO ALL OF US. We share one common thing: we're all human. Get over it. Write it in your journal. Someone reads it and gets pissed. Screw them-your journal is YOUR book. Not theirs. If they read it, that's THEIR problem. NOT YOURS.
It's your book.
It's for you.
Don't ever forget that.
Go make something and don't look back.
Games.
Pedestals.
Pissing contests.
Judgment.
Come on.
Seriously.
Get off your fucking pedestal. Don't put your art on a fucking pedestal. Don't put artists on pedestals. Stop being so damn judgmental. It's a fucking journal page. Seriously.
This isn't to anyone in particular, btw. It's to *anyone* and *everyone* who has ever had any doubt-self imposed or thrust upon them by others. I was going to say something yesterday but needed time to soak it all in.
What do you use a journal for?
It's YOUR safe place. It can be a place to:
document
record
vent
rave
gush
play
experiment
get it out and onto the page
create
dream
-seriously all those cute little word stamps (dream, believe, create) totally apply to art journals.
Your art journal is for *you*. Who really and honestly gives a shit if someone else doesn't think it's "good enough". HELLO? IT'S A JOURNAL. It's not hanging in the fucking Louvre.
It's
a
JOURNAL.
It ain't the Mona Fucking Lisa.
I highly doubt that Da Vinci sat down and worried if what he was putting in his books was "good enough". Seriously.
I had someone email me and tell me that a page the other day "just wasn't me" (uh, it was a simple page and it said what *I* wanted it to say). Uh, okay. I've had someone email me in the past saying that my shit looked like everyone else's shit (fuck you, I don't think so). Uh, okay. I've had people say absolute stupid STUPID shit to me that they would never want said to them nor would they say it to anyone else. I just stand there with my mouth open thinking "Really? REALLY? Did that person REALLY just say that?" Yup. Yes, they did.
I'm not tooting my own horn (or anyone else's horn here). I'm not just talking about MY experiences here 'cause I KNOW others have had 'em too. I'm just saying that a journal is your place to sit and expressive yourself-in whatever means you want, however you want, whenever you want (though I am a firm believer in daily journaling). It is *not* meant to be judged.
It has nothing NOTHING to do with how GOOD ANYONE is.
If I want to cut out an image, slap it down and write a few words around it and call it a page. If it says what I want it to say, it's a page. I don't need someone to email me and tell me that "it's someone else's image", it's not "original", it's not "you". If it friggin' says what I want it to say and I'm DONE WITH IT, I'm moving on. I want YOU to do the same thing as a journal keeper. As a journal artist.
Open up the page. Paint. Collage. Write. Do whatever makes you happy. Push the envelope. Try. Fail. Try again. Push push push. Play play play. Use your book to express YOU. Move on when you need to move on.
Stop looking at the shit in the magazines and comparing your work to it. It's NOT you. YOU are you. Seriously. You want your work to look like YOU made it. Not like someone else made it.
Someone tells you you're not "good enough". Screw 'em. Do a page about it and move on. You've got a journal to fill. You've got pages to play with. You have things to record. You have moments and thoughts and ideas to spill out.
Worried about what's gonna happen when you croak? Why? We all go through shit-good times and bad times. It's that sappy saying called a roller coaster of life. It's true though-up, down, we all ride it. People say "Oh, I don't want my kids to read this when I die." WHY? So they'll find out that Mom (or Dad) was a real, honest, unique person?? That Mom or Dad fucked up every now and then. That good things and bad things happen-TO ALL OF US. We share one common thing: we're all human. Get over it. Write it in your journal. Someone reads it and gets pissed. Screw them-your journal is YOUR book. Not theirs. If they read it, that's THEIR problem. NOT YOURS.
It's your book.
It's for you.
Don't ever forget that.
Go make something and don't look back.
Comments
You ROCK.
As you were writing, I had the big boss in the room for my yearly eval.I am good enough, thank g-d. Actually, I'm damn good...Even if my eval form has nothing next to the "committees" I'm in section. "Amen" on your post.
On another note-GOOD NEWS! A Dutch company is taking over production of Polaroid film. Heard it on NPR this morning if you want more info.
M
I'm just concerned my dog is gonna slobber on my journals and chew them :)
You make very good points Kelly.
BE HONEST...with yourself...and everyone else.
We haven't been in contact for a while but it's great to see that you're still out there creating . . . and of course, you're absolutely right.
I got the link to your blog via Twitter (thanks to ArtbyChrysti)-- I'm glad to "see" you again online.
Kim (Nickens)
I guess I was just taking the long way around to get to the point of saying YOU GO, GIRL! I love your pages and the parts of yourself that you share through them...keep up the awesome work!
Peace & Love,
~Barb~
I love your work, I love your honesty and how you put it out there on paper. That's what makes it you, that you created it, not how it looked or what style you chose that day. I do all types of journaling. I don't have a particular style.
I gave up caring what anyone thought of me a long time ago, I was raised that way by a wonderful woman, my Mom. And good for you for not letting them get to you.
I wish I had you say these words several years earlier! My inner critic has been very loud for years and years, and since my husband is a mathematician he has not much to say in this region of interest. The world has been a very lonesome place before I found the internet and a plethora of friends and artists out there.
Love, love, love your class!
So well said. Loud and clear.
I get that so many times with my writing, where someone gets hurt and it isn't about them (currently writing a post about this).
I know I will die probably sooner than later and I always tell my family that when they look at my journals just to remember if I hate them one day, keep reading, because I will love them the next.
You inspire Kelly.
Love Renee
And that's all of the babbling you'll get from me today! mwah!
On the topic of other people reading... there are some things I paint over - just cause I don't want to have to edit out what I need to vent over and people do look at my journals occasionally - and I really don't want to deal with the fallout when they read how I REALLY felt the last time they unloaded on me. ;-)
Seriously, Kells, I love your stuff. Even when I don't agree with you, I love that you make me think and how you integrate the most disparate elements into your unique voice. Keep it up!
(just one silly question *at least, I'm aware it is a f**** silly question* but I'm a real beginner... where do you find those awsome pictures you put in your journal ? I pick up some magazines, print sometimes from things found on the internet... but I don't find those kind of "spiritual" pictures (this lotus hit me so much!)
Have a nice week-end Kelly :)
I love drama and intensity. Guess it comes from being raised in Italy and working with Italians.
I think I'll go through paint and words around right now!
I'm so happy it resonates with many of you :)
Nolwenn-I actually "collect" images of lotus. There are just certain things that stick with me that I love-hands, lotus, feet/shoes, hearts, birds, etc... I always recommend going to the bookstore and making a big pile of magazines to go through :) Also used bookstores, new age stores, etc...
Grab a camera,too and visit a local garden, etc... :)
How can anyone tell us what should and shouldn't be in our personal journals??!!
Keep it up!
Mandy
well said
some people totally don't get 'it'
they never will
and not worth worrying over
as a whole we are doing what we can to encourage and inspire...those who are following along and are on the same page will benefit..those that are like you and eveyone made comment on
simply won't.
:)
I know my pages aren't anywhere near what people consider perfect, but I never much cared (what they thought) and it infuriates me to no end when I hear others say they are even afraid to start journaling because they aren't good enough. Next time I see that posted anywhere I'm going to refer them to this post!
Linda
My fav part though....that you cursed. Ha! I just love that. I don't curse on my blog, but in real life...I'm a total potty mouth and very proud of it.
~Magick on Sister~
Melissa
Have a nice day/week ;)
I am re-visiting you after Rice Freeman Zachary mentioned this post in her similar rant.
I just wanted to say thank you for being who you are. Yours is one of the first artist blogs that I visited. There was no superiority with you but encouragement to play, to experiment. That is what I want to be for others as well.
I bought neocolours from you, probably 2 years ago. They are still going strong and I am using them with a group of highschool students now that I am passing on the encouragement and permission I have received. There is no right or wrong or better and best ... there is just who we are and the mark that we make.
Thanks!
take care and I look forward to signing up for your next class as soon as I can:)
Hugs,
Adriane